Female oppression: “I hate being the Daughter”

My future niece is six years old.

She’s the oldest of two and her younger brother is three years old.

She’s an absolutely beautiful child, however the adults in her life seem to have little time for her now her brother is on the scene, and also no idea how they’re teaching her to view life and the world.

Before her baby brother was born, she was spoiled absolutely rotten, and in most ways she still is, however, she had three years of not having to share the love, attention and affection spotlight, and now she does.

She’s gone from being able to do no wrong, to being reprimanded (in most instances) when she goes up against her brother, for just about any reason.

Early on there was no limit to what she was “allowed” to have or do, but then baby “bro” came along, and as adults do, the stereotyping and enculturation began.

It is lost on her that I (who as far as she knows, is a girl, just like her) can and do do most everything. 

Why is it lost on her?

Because the other women in her life, her mother, (one of) her grandmothers, her other aunts etc etc, and yes (to an extent), also the main man in her life, her dad, use the fact that she is a “girl” as the reason she is treated differently to her brother, and use her “sex/gender” as a reason for expecting certain things from her.

It makes me cringe to watch it, I see and feel her spirit being broken, and it tears me in two.

I’ve started to invest my time with her wherever I can, we went to the movies the other day, she came home with me and didn’t want to go home so she ended up spending the afternoon with me.

I hope that I can do some good for her and her life, but fuck is it hard for me, to try and make it all comprehendible for her, I’m someone who is (apparently) not supposed to understand sexism, female oppression, misogyny, I’m not supposed to know anything about it (if you’re to listen to and believe radical feminists).

I’m supposed to be the “devil”, the modern day foundation that female oppression is built on. A “cliche”, I do nothing but reinforce stereotypes, and THAT is the very reason I’m a fake and invalid as a woman.

They hate and would deny me (if they knew), but the truth is that that natal women perpetuate female oppression far worse than I could or ever have.

And then it gets worse!

I’m trying to make life comprehendible to this beautiful child, telling her that people treat boys differently to girls, and not to listen to them, that it’s as good if not better to be a girl, because girls can do “anything” and boy’s really can’t, and then she brings up the other child I’ve mentioned a few times in this blog (The one who likes to dress up in her costumes and play with her dolls who may or may not end up being gay or “trans”) and tells me he’s jealous of her.

How the fuck am I to try and build her up for being who she is (a girl) whilst at the same time trying to stem the hate that (I can see) is growing in her (even now, at this early age) for “boys”, the same “hate” I personally feel even now, everywhere I look around the internet. 

That kid could really use a friend, someone who understands them, (I know for a fact, I was there myself) they don’t need hate, but that is what they’ll get from all angles.

And why? 

Because people are idiots!

These kids, they both need “someone”, how can I stand on both sides of the argument?

“Girls are treated different to boys, except this one child, who everyone treats like a boy, and who appears to you to be one, but who might actually be a girl (on the inside) and should be allowed to be a girl and be treated as one”

Further, they’re both too young for me to feel comfortable talking about such adult subjects, without being concerned I’ll influence them and cause them big problems later in life, not to mention the questions they’re parents would ask about me if these kids came home and mentioned any of what I could potentially say.

There is so much "gendered" bullshit everywhere I look and I hate it all so much!

I don’t know who built and is running this crazy world, but they certainly do have fetish for irony.

I’m sure they’re up there looking down at me laughing they’re ass off!